Okay, so now it is officially and legally over and now you need to move on after divorce.
You are done with your partner’s disturbing or bothering behavior and you have separated from your partner. Now it is time for you to get over it and move on. of course, it won’t be easy and it is understandable. But the key to living your life peacefully is getting over an experience that has hurt you or broke you. You cannot hold onto things that were not meant to last. Accept and move on.
Now that you have signed your divorce papers and no matter who wanted this to happen, you cannot change what you just signed and walk-off from. Things, of course, would have been better if this did not have to happen but now that it has happened you need to deal with it, with a strong heart. No matter how long your marriage sustained, now it has broken.
You are now independent to make your own decisions so take charge of your life and read out how to move on.
Tips to move on after the divorce:-
1 – Pack all of the stuff
Now that you have signed the papers and nothing has left for you to hold onto the memories, pack all of your partner’s stuff in the box and keep it away from your sight. Make sure you do not reach them. Clear all of the memories with your partner and just focus on making new memories. Make sure that when you pack the stuff, hand it over to a person and let him/her keep it somewhere, and make sure you do not know the place because you cannot go and open it back.
2 – Emotions
Work through your emotions. Do not let your previous relationship impact your new life. Think that life has given you a second chance. So try to work on your emotions and focus on your life. I know it is not that easy but, you have to work on it before these emotions hit you badly.
3 – Love yourself
Do not let your bad marriage make you think that you were not good enough. Divorce is not a new thing on this earth. Two people do not get along so they divorce. But that does not mean that you were bad or your ex-partner was bad. Just that you both were not compatible enough to carry on with your marriage. Love yourself. You are the best.
4 – Invent
Invent a new side of yourself. Think about what you are going to do with your new life. Adopt a new passion. Work on it. Think about what will make you happy and do it. Execute your new business plan or adopt a pet or think about working online or go for an interview. Do whatever you want to do to make yourself happy.
5 – Stay alone
Stay alone does not mean lock yourself in a room or apartment. It means do not go for a relationship or do not download any dating application. Be alone as in stay single till you process the thought of being divorced. Stepping into a new relationship this soon will impact you. Stay alone till you get over your last relationship with your ex-husband.
6 – Do not be ashamed
Being divorced or having a divorcee tag is not bad. There is no shame in it and let people keep on blabbering about it or let them laugh or be shocked. This is natural and people anyhow need a chance to poke their noses in other people’s lives. Do not let their negativity impact you. This is life and it is your life so take a charge and move on. Do not think about people. During this phase just think about yourself.
7 – Be flawless at your new roles
Now that you have been divorced and you are facing a problem with the things which usually your husband/wife used to do, take the charge and do it. Embrace your new roles. Do not let yourself be held back. Learn it and do it. Surprise all with it. And let your ex-partner know that you can handle your life alone.
8 – Past you
Think about how you used to be before marriage. You may have given up on things that you used to do before marriage. Wake those things up and start doing it. Be like before. Go through those memory lanes. Be like before. Forget about the middle life that is, married life.
9 – Let go of anger
There is no point in holding onto the anger within you. It is understandable that either you are angry at yourself or your partner. Holding onto such anger will keep you connected emotionally with your partner or that relationship you were in. let it go and move on. You cannot help it, can you? Take some time out and relax. Your mind and body need to relax.
10 – Plan ahead
Now you need to decide what you are going to do. You need to plan your life. But keep in the mind not to look behind anymore and just focus on yourself and your life. Decide what you want to do. Whether you want to work or do some online job that is youtube, etc do it. Plan and execute. This will distract you from all of the tensions.
Here are some activities which might help you to focus on your present life:-
1- Do proper exercise or yoga
2- Have a healthy diet
3- Proper Meditation
I know processing your divorce is not an easy job but, trying won’t harm either. Don’t let yourself break down. It is life and bad things do happen in life but, you need to move on and that is the truth of your life. Accept the fact, process it, and move on. If you still cannot move on, please get help as soon as possible, and don’t ignore your emotional and mental health.